After all this time .....

This is my fourth day in Medan. Things have gone well so far. I get to enjoy the menus of Medan's culinary I've been wanting to eat since long ago before I made it here. I get more than enough sleeping hours. And let's say that has cover up everything I need.

Spending days here is what I've always wanted since exactly two months ago, 22nd October 2010. That day means a lot for me, eventhough time has passed quite long since then. I thought my hometown would be a perfect escape for the hectic mind. I got no memories here, none of the painful. And right, I'm okay. Perfectlu am.

Okay, so this is just me. Even the least thing here can remind me of those days, the good days that now have became my nightmares. I still hear sounds, I see pictures, I imagine things. All of what I shouldn't have done. I don't know that it could be this hard. I'm sick of this. Really.

I'VE MOVED ON!! This is what I've been trying to yell out loud. No matter what's going to happen afterwards. I'm living my own life. Maybe the presence of that someone that I'm getting used to today. While for tomorrow, I'll leave the future to decide..

Home :)

December 18 th, 2010.
I've been counting down for this day since like two months ago. I'm coming back to Medan today and this still looks like a dream for me. Going "home" after half year living apart from my family. This is going to be great as soon as I made it to my hometown.

It's cliche how I had been doing the exactly same thing six months ago, counting down days to 1st July. Yeah, different time, different place, different reason, and different expectation.

Days before 1st July, the eagerness to be in Jakarta (now my current location) had been so strong. I was going to leave my hometown to study. I knew that it's going to be hard. The days without parents and sister, things I had never imagine that today would become the struggle that I have to fight everyday. I would have laughed now if I remember the things that had been the "motivator" to this city. Love (or should I call it infatuation). #brblaughingsarcasticly. I won't tell much about this, because I don't  regret any single thing that has happened upon me, any moment I've been through. Sweet and bitter.

I just never thought that the same thing which had attracted me to Jakarta, is the exact same thing that distracts me. Once I put my step into this cosmopolitan city, I could survive since the very first day. But as the reasons that kept me strong faded away, I feel like going home. Immediately.

And here I am, today, here, writing this blog as I'm on my way to airport. I don't know what I'll be through when I'm going back here. I won't bother much, as long as I could still smile for the rest of this year. :) All I know is, I'm coming home today, the place I belong. No heartache, no hatred.

Wish me a safe flight! :D

I wish I had a boyfriend (?)

Would life be better with the presence of a boyfriend?
Would I be happier if there's someone commit himself as mine?
Would I feel more secure if someone promise to take care of me?
I never know the answer to these questions. They might be simply range between yes and no, but I can rarely decide. However, I would have answered no to all those similiar questions days before, but silly today, I really wish I had a boyfriend.

Let's rewind what had happened today.

Pagi sebelum berangkat ngampus, gue sempatin singgah di bengkel las. (note: gue order tukang las buat bikin kerangka besi tugas final gue). Entah gue yang bego, atau tukang las-nya yang jago nge-bego-in gue, akhirnya gue setuju bayar 250 ribu (hasil nawar dari yang tadinya 350 ribu). Mahal? Ya. Mahal. Banget. Ditambah lagi, setelah confirm ke beberapa teman seangkatan, ada yang make jasa tukang las dengan upah 10% dari total transaksi gue dengan tukang las orderan gue. Nyesek? Banget.

(Sebenarnya kejadian yang mirip kayak begitu udah pernah gue alami. (Untungnya), waktu itu gue sadar lagi ditipu)

Telaah : Apa yang salah dari gue? Muka yang terlalu polos? Atau gue yang terlalu cepat percaya sama orang?

Oke, cukup membahas soal tukang las yang berhasil mood gue hancur setengah-harian. Mari pindah ke masalah parkiran.
Bisa dibilang apes, gue hari ini dapat parkir di daratan nan jauh dari kampus. Kalo dihitung-hitung, mungkin ada sekitar 150 meter jarak antara mobil gue dan kampus. Jauh? Silahkan Anda pertimbangkan.
Gue pribadi, nggak masalahin seberapa jauh gue harus jalan dari parkiran ke kelas tapi seberapa banyak bawaan yang gue harus angkut dari mobil ke kelas.

Rute 1: Mobil - Kelas

List bawaan:

1. tas (bawaan rutin kalo kuliah)
2. kerangka draft 3
3. 3 paket modul buat draft 3 (yg untungnya masih dikit)
4. gulungan gambar studi movement (yg seharusnya nggak dibawa)
5. goody bag yang isinya perlengkapan "bertukang"
6. kardus ukuran A1 yang udah kepake seperempat

Rute  2: Kelas - Mobil

List bawaan: kardus ukuran A1 tadi yang nggak jadi diapa-apain di kelas

Rute 3: Mobil - Kelas

List bawaan: 2 birmed ukuran A1

Rute 4: Kelas - Mobil

List bawaan:

1. tas
2. kerangka draft yg tetap kosong + modulnya
3. gulungan gambar studi movement
4. goody bag lagi
5. birmed yang udah berubah jadi kontur tanah
6. sisa potongan birmed yang gede-gede
7. birmed temen yang ketinggalan

Rute 5: Mobil - Kelas

Nggak bawa apa-apa

Rute 6: Kelas - Mobil

List bawaan: 2 draft tugas gue yang terakhir (takut dibuang, karena isu-nya studio bakal dibersihin besok)

Mari berkalkulasi. 6 x 150 meter = 900 meter.

Dan apakah kalo seandainya gue punya pacar, keadaan bakal "less-hectic"? Probably yes.

Masalah tukang las:
SEANDAINYA gue ditemenin sama seseorang, terutama cowok, mungkin gue nggak bakal ditipu habis-habisan sama si tukang las. Mungkin gue nggak bakal dianggap "nggak tahu apa-apa" soal dunia tukang.
Masalah bawaan:
Yang ini mungkin agak egois kedengarannya. Tapi SEANDAINYA gue punya pacar, BARANGKALI dia bakal bermurah hati mengurangi bawaan gue. Seperempatnya aja udah membantu banget.
Dan SEANDAINYA gue punya pacar yang sibuk, yang nggak bisa nemenin gue ke bengkel las atau bantuin gue bawain sedikit barang-barang gue, setidaknya gue punya tempat di mana gue bisa ceritain semua ini. Tempat yang jauh lebih baik daripada harus curhat di blog.

How's that sound? Pathetic?